Vicki Bernadet founded in 1997 the entity that now presides, and did so after making public that he had suffered abuse in his childhood and adolescence. The foundation that bears his name, works for the prevention, care and awareness against sexual abuse of minors. One of the successes of his personal work, and of his organization, is the normalization of the subject, so that he can talk about it, and treat it like any other problem, without secrets or taboos.
The Foundation has worked since its inception because the different public administrations, at the regional, local or state level, are responsible for carrying out social policies in support of victims of child sexual abuse and commit themselves to preventing this abuse that affects to 20% of the population
You can no longer work exclusively palliatively on the consequences of child sexual abuse (ASI), so both Vicki and its foundation are getting (in Catalonia) this topic is discussed in the media, which is discussed in schools, and that is approached from institutions related to children. But in addition, since 2006, there has been a qualitative and quantitative change of the entity, in order to expand its scope of action throughout Spain. That is why Vicki participates in training tasks, represents his entity before public administrations, and intensifies his dissemination work.
And we want to contribute our grain of sand to make this terrible problem visible, and so that we are all aware that ASI, are still produced mostly in the closest environment of the child. In our eagerness we have been able to meet Vicki, a generous person, with clear ideas, warm and very capable of simply transmitting the information that is intended to be delivered. We have met her, and we have interviewed her, we leave you with her. Peques and More.- I have the impression that children are still being sexually abused within the family environment, is that so?
Within child abuse, a very high percentage happens in the intra-family environment: this is something we do not like to know and we are not prepared to listen
Vicki Bernadet.- Unfortunately, sexual abuse continues to occur too often, being a problem that occurs more than 80% of the time within the family or the closest environment of the child. Against the visibility of the ASI, factors related to the (erroneous) perception that these abuses occur in families with a lower socio-economic level, or stereotypes that relate them to aggressions by people completely outside the family.
We must be informed of a fact proven by various studies, which show that 23 to 25% of girls, and 10 to 15% of boys suffer sexual abuse before age 17. In Spain, Dr. Félix López showed these scandalous figures through a comprehensive study presented by the Ministry of Social Affairs in 1994, since then the incidence figures have not changed.
In fact, other more recent investigations carried out in different Autonomous Communities are confirming these percentages. We cannot deny, therefore, that we are facing a public health problem that requires specialized attention, but above all, an awareness of all.
PyM.- Sexual violence against minors can take many forms, but are we prepared to accept that a child can be abused by a relative?
V.B.- Obviously not, it is something we do not like to know and we are not prepared to listen; in any case it would be too strong to know that an uncle, a grandfather, a father, a cousin or a neighbor have abused our children, but the reality, the facts are there; That is why children need effective protection at all costs, beyond prejudices and beliefs.
PyM.- Are the figures you mention similar in other countries around us?
Studies conducted in Spain (Dr. Fèlix López, 1994. Ministry of Social Affairs) and in other countries of the European Union, the United States and Canada, estimate that 23-25% of girls and 10-15% of boys They suffer sexual abuse before the age of 17. 60% of these do not receive any help
V.B.- Yes, other countries of the European Union, besides the United States and Canada, are suffering from this problem, in figures very similar to those provided by Félix López 19 years ago: one in four girls, and one in six boys, could suffer childhood abuse.
PyM- Do you think it has improved collective awareness towards ASI?
V.B.- Well, the truth is that not much, at least since I am working in this area, especially at the social level (of citizenship), the general perception of people has not yet moved away from stereotypes (those that make us think that a child can only suffer a rape by a stranger, or that the only sexual violence that our children can potentially receive comes from child pornography networks).
But nevertheless, from the Institutions if it is being provided with resources to do prevention, attend to victims, or provide information; as examples we have the advances in some Autonomous Communities such as Catalonia, the Balearic Islands, the Basque Country or Andalusia. Without going any further, in Catalonia, the approval of the Law on the Rights and Opportunities of Children and Adolescents, placed the fight against child abuse at the same level as that which acts against sexist violence. One of the measures established by the Law was the creation of a Research Center on child abuse, which included the promotion of specific services for victims of sexual abuse.
There is still social fear of uncovering these issues openly and from all possible perspectives.
PyM.- What would it take to reduce the number of minors suffering sexual abuse?
V.B.- You need a brave society, brave people and committed to the visibility and reporting of ASI, Institutions are also required to be involved to prevent and educate children, so that they know how to protect themselves from abusive situations. It is necessary that common sense prevails so that we all have tools that allow us to address this problem.
The experiences of communities like Catalonia should be generalized, because prevention works (although the results are seen in the long term), however, the years pass and there is no political will in this regard. The same does not happen (for example) in other countries, where prevention is part of institutional actions, and where it is normal to protect children through preventive actions that will protect them against these (and other situations, such as improper use from Internet).
Our Foundation develops several projects, among which one responds to the detected need to offer clear and specialized information on child sexual abuse, free of taboos and false beliefs, both socially and professionally. It is aimed at children from five to 10 years old, and work (through the narration and staging of a story) a reflection on the rights of children, working skills for self-protection in situations of risk.
With our work and the support of the Educational Institutions, it is possible do a good preventive job, but this is a need that should be covered in other places in Spain; In fact, this is also the case in the Balearic Islands, although unfortunately it is not a generalized experience.
PyM.- Precisely I had planned to ask you: Why are there programs in schools to prevent drug use, or problems on the Internet, and children are not told about ASI?
V.B.- There is still fear of uncovering these issues openly and from all possible perspectives. Let us keep in mind that there are still many difficulties to do sex education, and this also influences when educating children in this regard. If we look at education from a global perspective, it is very appropriate for children to know their rights, and know that they have the right to talk about what they are concerned about.
PyM.- So how should this issue be addressed in family conversations?
V.B.- In the first place, it is not appropriate to "magnify" the matter, because it is not that children are afraid (in a situation that may or may not happen), but that they know how to protect themselves. In other words, it is much more appropriate to convey to them (for example) that their body belongs to them, that secrets are only good if they make us happy, that they have the right to say "no"; the other messages predispose them to be alert, to "defend themselves", therefore it is not necessary to focus so much on "if someone touches your genitals, ...", but to give a more positive vision, and focused on their own ability to manage responses and emotions
In this way the little ones feel safer, and knowing their rights, they will not put themselves in risk situations.
More prevention and outreach programs aimed at children would be necessary, so that they would know that they have rights, that they can be defended, that they can decide on their bodies; and also to teach them how to protect themselves
PyM.- What to do (as parents, educators) when listening to the confession of a child who has been sexually abused?
V.B.- The first thing is to believe him (never doubt). As part of our performance we will also congratulate you on your courage, and we will assure you that we will look for a solution. It is very important to reassure you and not ask direct questions immediately
What if he doesn't tell? How can we detect that abuse has occurred?
The most common would be this: not to be told, since children often hide abuse. But my answer is not aimed at pointing out indicators that allow us to detect the problem, however I must state that every father or mother You should consider the ASI as a situation to detect when "something does not work", what I call "having it on the list". Otherwise it would be impossible to detect them.
I mean, when we observe changes in attitude, behavior or routines in our child, we know that something is happening, and we usually attribute to known and controlled situations (moving, separation of parents, death of a relative, possible drugs - in adolescence -, etc.) but we prefer not to think that our son could have been the victim of abuse.
Taking into account the incidence figures indicated, we do ourselves a favor (and we do it to the children) if we consider this possibility, when detecting and acting. After all, it is part of the obligation to protect the children that parents have: it also includes protection against abuse.
PyM.- What motivates children not to be believed when they try to trust an adult to help them?
V.B.- We usually rule out that possibility because it is very hard to recognize what may have happened in our area, if it happens we must be able to put the problem first (ahead of our reaction) to act on him. It is common for guilt, disbelief, or other negative thoughts or emotions that can slow down a correct performance ...
PyM.- The first to believe and support the child, the second ...
V.B.- It should be remembered again that it is an obligation to protect the child, and that said, the responsible adult must stabilize the child, seek professional guidance, so that there is no double victimization (and that the child does not have to tell what it has happened many times to different people); These steps to take are ahead of the complaint.
Is it true that anyone has an obligation to act, even if we are not relatives of the abused child?
Yes, keep in mind that the Criminal Code specifies the obligation to communicate the facts that any person who suspects a child at risk has.
PyM.- Please confirm that ASI can be produced independently of the social, cultural or economic characteristics of the family?
Indeed, and that is why it is so difficult to limit the problem (since it is not exclusive of social classes, educational level of parents or types of families).
So important is to recognize this as admitting that the problem is not the victims, but the aggressors; and these can be both people with distorted sexuality, as others who are perfectly integrated into society, and in most cases they are close to children. Remember that intrafamily abuse (or in the child's environment) occurs in more than 80 percent of ASI cases.
What message should we give children about it?
Returning to one of the previous answers, children have rights that must be respected, on the other hand they have a body on which they can make decisions, and we must help them acquire the necessary self-protection tools.
So far the interview, on our part we must congratulate Vicki and his Foundation for their tireless work in favor of children and towards the protection of Children. I think that at the moment they deserve that the effort bears fruit, because not only society is not yet aware, but also that ASIs continue to be produced; But surely with the contribution of many people and institutions, this problem will be visible and many more lines of prevention can be established.
Thanks to Vicki for answering our questions and for his patience in a telephone interview that has lasted a long time.
